Friday, October 20, 2006

Making Sense Out of Nonsense

I don't post much about religion or Mormons these days, but AzEx' conversation with a Christian apologist got me thinking.

It's amazing how illogical it all sounds to me now. All of it! I'm trying to figure out when/how I switched to such a scientific way of thinking about things. Here is a list of things that I find to be complete nonsense:

* SomeONE being responsible for the creation of the earth/universe

* Mary being a virgin, yet conceiving a child

* Jesus' entire purpose (to come to earth and teach men the way back to their "father", and dying for our sins and being our salvation. I might have to make a separate post about this one...)

* Christianity is only the third or fourth largest religion, and still they think they've got all the answers

* Jesus bleeding from every pore and bearing everyone's sins. Everyone's sins. All billions of us. And, he bore ALL the sins. So we're talking astronomical amounts of sins he "bore". Uh-huh.

* Striving each and every day for something more, something in the future, something unknown or unseen. How great would the world be if we all would strive to live in the Present?? (This reminds me of a sign I saw in the Provo city building, when I was there to pay for a parking ticket. It read: The past is just history, The future is a mystery, Each day is a gift, That's why we call it the "present")

* That any entity can define happiness, marriage, the afterlife, or morality for anyone else and call it absolute. Preposterous.

I can't think of anything else off the top of my head. Got anything else that seems completely illogical to you? Please share! :)


J. said...

Ooooh! I get the first one! Me, Me! Pick me!

I have found the same stuff you did La. The analytical side of the brain seems to be trumping the touchy feely side of the brain now.

Yes, there are mysitcal things. But I don't believe organized religion can dictate every possible human possibility.

There are still times I wish there was a way to know, but that's the great outlook for the realm of possibility.

Why worry? People seem to be rather forward looking, but that 'is beyond the mark' (shall we say).

The world changes with every moment, and not with what happens at the end. I agree with La. Things would be much different if there weren't so much influence to sway people to a particular belief system.

Let alone, all of them are wrong if they seek to control people by giving certain rules or guidelines.

Sideon said...

* Nothing being perfect, not even Eden (letting a big penis/snake/Lucifer run around) or Heaven (WAR in Heaven?)

* Eve being made from Adam's rib. Eve getting shafted for eternity with that "original sin" bullshit that was part of "God's Plan."

* If God is the one true God, then what the fuck is he doing being jealous? Petty bastard.

* The only way Mary could have been a virgin and then conceived a child would have been through a celestial c-section.

* The complete lack of gay heroes and fabulousness in the Bible.

Outside of the Christian mindset, these things confuse and/or bewilder me:

* Thong underwear (crack is whack)

* Paris Hilton

* Gay Mormon Republicans

* Mango lotion (joking!)

Simeon's Peep Stone said...

AMEN La! It is truly bizarre for life to be this way when we were once on the other side of the fence. It's surreal to go from touchy feely TBM to All Knowing No Feeling Having Exmo. I'm kidding about the no feeling part, but nothing religious makes sense to me at all now. I can respect AZ for searching out Judaism, and find nothing wrong with it, but I see just as many holes in Judaism as there are in Christianity and Mormonism. I guess that's the beauty of being free from Mormonism. You can be and do anything you feel you should be or do.

Sister Mary Lisa said...

Some of my illogical issues:

Why, when the Egyptian Papyri of Book of Abraham fame were returned to the church, didn't the people of the church want to know more? Why were they OK with just getting nothing, nada, squat about it?

Why were the men who were sent on missions OK with their wives jumping ship and being married to JS? Why did some of them decide to do the whole marry-as-many-beauties-as-you-can thing?

Why do people in the LDS faith feel like it's OK that only those women sealed to a faithful LDS man in the temple will be able to live in God's presence in the next life? Sister Mary Lisa's only chance for eternal exaltation is if she's willing to seal herself to some other dude after her hubby dies or after she dies?

dfb said...

Here's what makes good sense:

I have an invisible buddy who loves me so, so, so much that he made a special place of fire and torment for me and well, pretty much everybody else. But he loves me and doesn't want me to end up there for all eternity because its such a nasty place so he put together a plan for me to not go there. What a great plan, too:

1) kiss god's ass continually,
2) don't touch myself,
3) make god feel good about himself,
4) eat pork, but only if it's killed the correct way,
5) don't eat pork,
6) do good things,
7) pork is okay,
8) but not beer,
9) tell god how great he is,
10) stop touching myself.

Maybe I don't understand, exactly, what the plan is but I know that god is totally awesome.

Rebecca said...

Something that makes no sense to me is why you aren't posting RIGHT NOW because I want to read something because I'm being a bored lame-ass. I had a camp counselor who told me once that only boring people get bored. And I wanted to cry because she was insulting me because I said I was bored when REALLY I was terribly homesick, so then I was homesick AND a boring person. And right now I want to read your blog, but I've ALREADY READ EVERYTHING, so I'm being a boring person by being bored by your lack of posting at my every whim.

Rebecca said...

And now I just popped off my 'N' key because I spilled Triscuits all over last night and 'N' is one of the keys that is being a little reluctant now, and I was like, "this probably isn't the Best Idea Ever" but I did it anyway because I wanted to see if there were Triscuit remains under it. No remains, but then I couldn't get the key back on and I was like, "crap," but then it went back on. Hopefully I haven't damaged it.

montchan said...

Like I always tell people who want to talk to me about god, that the only Supreme Being that I am sure exists and have a testimony of is Donna Summer.

Therefore, only Donna Summer makes sense when it comes to religion.

everything else is illogical.

But I shudder at the thought of Donna Summer loving me in that supreme way.

from the ashes said...

How about this:

If the Gospel is so damn important, why send it to a 14 year old uneducated farm boy with a wild imagination? And why wait until 1820 (or so)?

The idea that the church must be true because there are 12 million members. Substract all those that don't actually attend or believe, and you have about 0.0001% of all humanity ever having "The Gospel." God doesn't seem to be trying very hard to show his people the right way.

Jer said...

The whole "power of discernment" thing was always a load of bullshit. You always hear those faith promoting rumors about it but I never once saw it first hand.

The true power of discernment is the guilt heaped on you getting you to confess. If nobody ever said anything the leadership would never know. You hear all the time of people going on missions without confessing having sex but later cracking and confessing.

Where was the power of discernment to stop them in the first place?

I've even heard of a case where a guy had sex the day he got his endowments out. Or people like Mike Norton sneaking into the temple on someone else's recommend. You think that'd set off all sorts of spiritual alarms.

Such bullshit!

-Domokun- said...

The other day I was thinking about religion, and it occured to me that every instance of organized religion comes down to one person (or a small group of people) using superstition, fear, uncertainty, and doubt to control people. If there really is a God, why do we need anyone else to come between Her and us? Organized religion all about the control and power over others. Mormonism is an especially egregious example of this.

(La, are you happy now that I finally posted on your blog?)

La said...


Happy doesn't describe it. :)

Bishop Rick said...

Things that make you go hmmm:

1. Why God never spoke to Asians or Africans.
2. Why God was worried that man would build a tower tall enough to reach him so he confounded their language so they could not complete the task.
3. Why Joseph Smith believed this to be true as well.
4. Why it was OK for Lot to get drunk and bang his daughters in an effort to continue his seed.
5. Why Lot's seed is never heard of again after going to such trouble to conserve it.
6. Why God killed all inhabitants of the earth because they were evil..even the newborn babies and toddlers were evil.
7. Why God didn't kill the isrealite children (if there was blood on the door) during his egyptian child killing spree.
8. Why is every birth mentioned in the bible and BOM a male birth?
9. How a descendant of Noah founded Egypt, but Egyptian documents have been found that predate the flood.
10. Why the people of the BOM called themselves Christians 500 years before Christ was born, but no one in the Bible ever called themselves christians until after the death of Jesus.