We all know the phrase "actions speak louder than words". But there is a power to words that we don't often acknowledge as we trudge through the daily grind. Just the fact that we have a phrase like "actions speak louder than words" signifies that we associate words with ideas to get desired actions. Words, definitions, metaphors, and many others are tools we utilize to be understood, and to try to understand others.
I remember when I first met Eric. Ever and over-eager, he used to tell me "I love you" nearly constantly. I got a fax one time that had the phrase "Je Taime" written on it probably 500 times, if not more. While I liked being spoiled with it at first, it did get old. It lost its meaning through repetition. Besides, I come from a family of people who talk alot, but don't easily delve into their emotions and feelings. For some reason, it's easier for us to talk about farts, for gods sake, than it is to discuss things that make us really uneasy, like love. Weird.
By contrast, my wedding ring (the one I truly consider my wedding ring, not the actual ring I got when getting married) has a phrase engraved on it: "You and no other". Actually, it too is in French; "Vu et nul autre" is what it really says. Those words have been consistently powerful to me, especially on something like a ring, which is symbolic in so many ways.
I'm coming up on my 1 year bloggaversary in a couple of weeks. In looking back over the past year, I wonder why it is that I was able to let the church go so fluidly and completely. (OK, so it's not completely gone, but it only holds a very minor portion of my thoughts anymore) Why is that? Do I just have a personality that lets things go easily, even things that were the most important thing in my life for many years? How come my transition has been this easy?
Here's what I think: I think that through the words I've written, and the ideas I've formulated and let go into the universe, that I truly have had some benefit which maybe lots of people who exit the church don't have. Yep, I'm saying that my words have actually help heal me. Is that crazy talk?
For the most part, day to day, my actions validate my words. Or invalidate them. But to see the power of communication and understanding to its fullest, we must have a good foundation in sharing our common language. Sharing the words that we hold inside. Releasing the emotions we feel, through words. Communicating, I once learned, is a two-sided method to maintain and establish lasting relationships and a sense of community, of belonging.